Alone am I
I am alone
The one thing I feared, I am.
Oh me, oh my!
What fate to be held for one as alone as I?
For we all are human
And we all must make resolutions,
Regardless to the reaction of others.
One single choice made in an instant
Has left me ostracised forever,
And now the isolation tears my heart into a thousand pieces,
Leaving behind only traces of what could have been.
As the dictionary describes it – “to be without help”
Without help I am indeed.
As the dictionary describes it – “unaccompanied”
Unaccompanied I am indeed.
Being alone means dining by yourself,
Being alone means watching t.v. by yourself,
Being alone means going to the movies by yourself,
Only to watch as others enjoy what you never will.
Being alone means no-one to share your dreams with,
No-one to share your fears with,
No-one to talk to, or listen to,
No-one to hold, or be held by,
No-one to love, or be loved by,
Being alone means waking up at 02:00 AM
To the sound of a wailing infant whose cries are as loud as yours are.
Nothing is of significance anymore.
No noise, no laughter, no nothing.
Just the deafening silence of your thoughts,
And as the void grows deeper every day
You feel yourself drifting from your sanity.
Your only strength becomes your biggest weakness,
And all you want to do is fade away into oblivion.
But in your solitude your imagination runs wild,
And pretence is your only hope.
For it is here where He speaks to you,
Calling you, drawing you closer,
And as you press on your vision becomes clear.
You see what you’ve been too blind to see before.
You hear what you’ve been too deaf to hear all along.
The greater truth that you were never alone, never was, nor ever will be!
He has been there all the time.
From the moment you were born
To the time your body will cease to breathe,
He was, and always will be
Faithfully by your side.
Your hero, your best friend, your companion
Standing on the sideline,
Watching while you succeed,
And watching while you fall.
So many times He wished you would call,
But in spite of your denial, He never wished you away.
And as you realise this you run swiftly to Him
Where He stands with arms open wide,
And He swathes you with His love.
His perfect, unconditional, divine love.
With a soft touch He heals your wounds,
And a tender word He mends your heart,
And with an affectionate hug He restores your soul.
He gently picks up the pieces of your life,
And helps you put them back together again.
He gives you courage to face each day,
And wisdom to answer them.
You find peace and you are content.
As time goes by your love for Him grows stronger,
And His plan for you grows greater.
His spirit stirs you,
And His voice guides you.
You worship Him and adore Him,
And you are one.
Praise and thanks be to you, my Lord!
Whose love never fails me.
I shall remain forever loyal, forever devoted, forever true
For I am nothing without You.
You are the Saviour of my soul,
And King of my world.
- Annie Kriel
A crack in the candle is all I see
That crack in the candle is all about me
What I’ve said and what I’ve done
Is who I am and who I’ve become
The guilt, the shame, I cannot erase
The guilt, the shame, I cannot face
The crack is too big, too late to repair
The blemish of sin taking me there
When all of a sudden my Father appears
Closing the crack ‘til it disappears
No guilt, no shame, no sorrow, no woe
The beauty remains in the candle alone
That crack in the candle I cannot see
The crack in the candle I used to be
Who I am and what I’ve become
Is all because of His great love.
- Annie Kriel
Surely everyone has a someone
With whom they have so much fun
To share secrets, laugh and play
Take time to visit every day
A person who makes you shine like a star
Because of who, not what you are
Well I have one, yes I do
That is well known in others too
He is loving and faithful, its visible He cares
And all these qualities make me aware
Of the type of person He really is
If we had to part Him I would greatly miss
I hope you know who I’m talking about
The One that is always around
He may be dead in you but alive in me
Just talk to Him - that’s the key!
God, Lord, or Jesus is His name
Once you find Him its never the same
He acts as a spirit in my heart
Within my mind He does His part
To create a soul that is pure and godly
Through a voice that speaks ever so softly
We do adore and love each other
So I don’t want any other
To me I think its quite outrageous
That His love, in spite of all, can tame the greatest
And I feel sorry for them
Who don’t have such a special friend.
- Annie Kriel
Thank you, Lord, for lips to praise Your name.
Thank you for a voice to worship Your throne.
Thank you for eyes to see Your glory,
And ears to hear Your voice.
Thank you for a tongue to taste the fruit of Your spirit,
And a nose to smell the scent of Home.
Thank you for teeth to sink them into life’s obstacles,
And a neck so that I may stretch it out for You.
Thank you for legs so that I may run to You,
And feet to walk in victory.
Thank you for arms so to capture the splendour of You,
And hands so I can lift them to the Heavens in awe of You.
Thank you for strength to do Your will,
And courage to live by faith.
Thank you for discernment to recognise the truth.
Thank you for opportunities to show Your compassion.
Thank you for wisdom to know Your thoughts,
And hope to believe in Your promises.
Thank you for the desire to be mentored by Your Word,
And endurance so that I may prove my loyalty to You.
Thank you for the knowledge that I am saved by grace.
Thank you for guidance so that I may be led by You,
And time for You to develop Your character in me.
Thank you for a free will so that I may choose to serve You.
Thank you for intuition to know who You are.
Thank you for a body so I may dedicate it entirely to You,
And a mind to understand You.
Thank you for a soul to experience Your virtue,
And a spirit to sense Your presence.
And most of all, thank you for a heart to feel Your love.
- Annie Kriel
Alone at war a soldier fights
His enemies attack to no avail
He is strong and bold,
And his courage carries him forward.
His hope sustains him
And his faith protects him.
He is our brave warrior,
And he has won the victory.
On his journey home the people cheer
Their shouts of gratitude fill the air.
He is on his way home.
Home to where his Father greets him proudly,
And gives him a hero’s welcome.
- Annie Kriel
I’m sorry for my part, the wrong that I did
To cause you so much pain by all the things I said
I wish I’d never said them, and the world would swallow me whole
Maybe then you will forget, how I could be so cold
Please can you forgive me, and forget this awful deed
Forget the way I treated you, and forgive my selfish need
I don’t know why I said those things, or why I felt that way
But all I ask is for your love, to be with me on this day.
- Annie Kriel
If I could add up all the things You told me,
And count all the times You got me out of trouble,
And put on a scale all the things You have given me,
And measure all the things You have done for me,
And record all the ways You helped me,
If I could walk as far as Your wings carry me,
And run as swift as Your guard is for me,
And jump as wide as Your plans are for me,
And climb as high as Your hopes are for me,
And swim as deep as Your love is for me,
I wouldn’t be.
For to do all these things
Is to defy infinity
- Annie Kriel
One day soon our Saviour will come
Riding on horses, bright as the sun
Then we all will see
His love for you and me
As He comes down to rescue us
And take us all home.
- Annie Kriel
In the tranquillity of the night
I gaze at Heaven’s glow above,
And ponder the thought of my very existence
When suddenly I see a radiant star
A star different from the rest
The brightest shining star in the whole sky
And I have my answer
- Annie Kriel
If I was gone tomorrow, would you ever miss me?
If I was gone tomorrow would you even care?
Would you race around in search of me?
Or would only your sorrow find you there?
Would you then somehow realise, in all the things unseen
How much I actually fought for you, in places you’d not been?
Would you love me then and only, the way I love you now?
Or would your pride ever so keep you, from deeply knowing how?
Would you then be truly grateful, for all the things I did?
Or would you even remember, anything I ever said?
Would you then be in total peace for me, or filled with great regret?
For what once was present, now is gone
Forever to be set.
If I can leave you anything, I will leave you this
That one day in the heavens, I will still greet you with a kiss.
- Annie Kriel
Over the skies and far away
Lives my friend in another day.
Fighting for love, fighting for hope
Hanging on by a thin thread of rope.
Oh dear, oh dear, if only you knew
How special you are simply for you.
Please don’t give up, and please don’t give in.
Let the world not lose you because of a sin.
For in the hidden and in the unknown
Lies the realisation that you’re not alone.
- Annie Kriel
If you only knew where I was now
Completely at rest and living the wow
Surrounded by love and filled with peace
No more pain but eternal bliss.
If you only knew who stands here beside me
The One who gives and who is, who lets me just be
He holds me close and treasures my soul
Here in this place I know no cold
Only the warmth of His glow in the streets of gold
Where my heart holds the memories until you come home.
- Annie Kriel